Nancy Okerlund
Volume 2, Issue 12, 07/10/08
Introvert Grandmother
The day before yesterday I officially joined the grandmothers
club! My first grandchild, known these past many months as
"Baby JJ", (her parents' first names both start with "J") came
out and got her new name, Skylar Jane.
I started wondering about being an introvert grandmother last
December, the day we got the news about Baby JJ's upcoming
arrival. I started wondering because my family made comments
about what I think might be described as my "subdued" response.
It was cheerful commenting. And I suppose because they're so
used to me talking about introverts, they even decided it was
an introvert way to respond.
For me, of course, how I responded was just how I responded.
I was in shock. Not that newlyweds announcing they're having a
baby is shocking information. But getting the news that you're
going to be a grandmother is a shock (of sorts :-)
And I was in awe. In awe that a new precious little family
member was in our midst.
I do think they were right - I responded like an introvert.
Introverts tend to have a slower pace than extroverts'. Our
longer brain pathway needs more processing time than
extroverts'. Often we don't talk about what we're thinking.
When we get new input, we're clearer about our thoughts and
feelings after sleeping on them. We like to reflect on things
- and we tend to speak softly.
So I had fireworks going on when I found out about Baby JJ, but
they were inside.
Over the months of her incubating, I've noticed that when people
ask me how I'm doing with becoming a grandmother, I don't have
much to report. It's as if the grandmother in me has been
incubating like Baby JJ. I don't know whether that's because
I'm an introvert or not.
But it probably is. Introverts like to know a lot about what
we experience - we like depth. It's a little hard to have much
perspective on being a grandmother before your grandchild is
out and about, giving you legitimacy :-)
Now Baby JJ has finished incubating and now I'm a "real"
grandmother. And I'm still an introvert - which makes me an
introvert grandmother.
I wonder how I'll behave.
I already have one of those tiny photo albums that's easy to
carry around with you. But it was a gift (from an extrovert :-)
- I probably wouldn't have bought it myself.
Over the past several years, as I've watched more of my peers
becoming grandmothers, I can tell it's a powerful club I've
joined. The criteria for membership may be grandchildren but
the main activity is love. I'm glad I got to join.
End of food for thought - on to a practical idea:
A Practical Idea for Introverts and Extroverts
Wonder whether your grandmothers are/were introverts or
extroverts and think about how their love comes/came through.
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